Hi everyone,
How’s your June going? I’m back from my holiday to France. To be honest it can best be described as a game of two halves but I’ll tell you more about that another time when I’ve given myself some time to think about what life lessons that particular mistake, cat sitting in Paris, has taught me.
In the meantime, I’m back to an overgrown garden and weeds who seem to think that they’re competing for a role in “Jack and the Beanstalk”.
The thing about weeds is that they are totally resilient aren’t they? Perhaps, I should have them on my logo because the amount of buttercups smothering my garden is astounding and don’t get me started on the cleavers! Do you remember them? We used to throw them at each other when we were young – now they are taking over my garden at a fast pace. I’ve grown to genuinely dislike them!
I’ve put a picture below if you need reminding what they are. And whilst we’re on the subject, I’m tired of Stinking Robert too! It’s growing everywhere!
One of the problems with weeds is that they’re not always easy to identify when they first come through. So you leave them a bit longer and before you know it they’ve bedded in and are almost impossible to remove without resorting to extreme gardening tactics.
Which I guess is very similar to burnout in the workplace. When it first comes along it can be easily misidentified as resilience. At it’s beginning you often see it being celebrated under accolades like; team player, someone who always goes the extra mile or star of the month. And just like the weeds in my garden, it’s roots can go very deep, before the full extent of the problem is revealed.
Even then I see exhausted people who still haven’t made the link between the signs their body is giving them and the realisation that burnout has literally stopped them in their tracks. Once we hit burnout, like dealing with deeply rooted weeds, it can take extreme self-care to get us back on track.
So grab a brew and let’s have a look at what burnout looks like in the workplace.
I hope you find it useful.
Cheers
Carol
Why Burnout Is Often Celebrated Before It’s Recognised
I’ve noticed that most organisations don’t have a burnout problem. What they do have is a burnout recognition problem.
The thing is burnout rarely arrives looking like someone who can’t cope.
It often appears looking like the employee everyone admires.
- The one who often says yes.
- The one who volunteers for the extra project. Or at least doesn’t give a good enough “no” when their manager gives it to them.
- The one who’s still online and answering emails at 10pm.
- The one who takes work home; evenings and weekends shunted into a black hole of always on.
- The one who keeps going when everyone else is struggling. Even taking on work to help their colleagues out.
And that’s exactly why burnout is so often missed.
The early warning signs don’t usually trigger concern.
They trigger praise.
The Employee We Celebrate
Do you have regular call outs at work?
Do the leadership team give accolades for an “always on” mentality?
Do they praise the person who can always be counted on to be a “team player”? (Team player is often another word for an over worker).
Do they praise their “can do” attitude? Because it’s true anyone can do anything if there are enough hours in the day or if they work through their own recovery time.
When someone consistently goes above and beyond, it’s easy to assume they’re thriving.
After all, they’re productive.
- Reliable.
- Committed.
- Helpful.
They don’t complain. They don’t make a fuss. They simply get on with it.
But, beneath the surface, a different story may be unfolding.
Many people heading towards burnout aren’t struggling because they’re incapable.
They’re struggling because they’re capable, conscientious and deeply committed. And they usually take on too much.
They care.
As I said, often too much.
And when caring becomes constant carrying, the cost can be significant.
The saying “if you want something doing ask a busy person” is the mantra for burnout.
The Burnout Trap
One of the greatest myths in workplace well-being is that burnout happens because people aren’t resilient enough.
The truth is that burnout often happens because people have been resilient for too long.
- They’ve ignored their own needs.
- They’ve overridden exhaustion.
- They’ve suppressed stress signals.
- And they’ve kept going despite what their body and mind have been trying to tell them.
If we’re being honest, the very behaviours we applaud can sometimes be the behaviours that place someone most at risk.
And that’s why organisations often miss it too.
Why Organisations Miss It
Part of the challenge for businesses is that we often look for burnout in the wrong places.
- We look for poor performance.
- We look at absence.
- We punish mistakes.
- We question people’s engagement and loyalty to the business.
Yet these are often the later stages because burnout usually starts much earlier.
It can show up as:
- Having difficulty switching off
- Being constantly available
- Taking on more workload than is reasonable
- Showing reluctance to delegate
- Working through breaks
- Feeling responsible for everything
- Having increased anxiety despite outward success
The problem for the individual is that many of these behaviours are rewarded, at least until they’re not.
The problem for the business is that once we see the top of the iceberg looming into view the issues have been growing for some time.
A Different Question
As a coach I know that the quality of the answer comes from the quality of the questions we pose. Instead of asking managers to consider:
“Who’s struggling right now?”
We ask:
“Who’s been coping too well and for too long?”
Who on the team rarely says no?
Who always picks up the slack?
Who consistently appears strong?
Do our teams even feel safe enough to admit when they’re struggling?
Because resilience isn’t about endlessly absorbing pressure.
Resilience is about having the capacity, support and self-awareness to respond to pressure without sacrificing our own wellbeing.
The Leadership Shift
Leaders play a crucial role here. I sometimes think that as we gain traction up the career ladder there’s a certain amnesia that sets in which causes us to forget the difficulties we and our colleagues, at the time, faced in the trenches.
We forget the joy we once felt at being allowed to leave early on a Friday.
We forget the resentment we felt when work came in demanding resolution late in the day.
We forget how hard it can be to deal with an unsupportive client or an unsupportive manager.
Instead, we become leaders and suddenly encourage the “push through.”
We expect people to just work harder.
We mislead them by calling problems short-term issues.
We allow our “amnesia” to cause harm.
You Can’t Bolt the Stable Door After the Horse has Bolted
It’s not the answer to offer well-being initiatives after problems emerge.
Instead, ideally we create environments where people can speak honestly before they reach breaking point. Psychological safety in the workplace is fundamental to well-being. It’s fundamental to the health of human beings in all areas of life. It’s also pivotal to excellent working relationships. In fact, it’s the difference between thrive and survive.
In psychologically safe workplaces:
Boundaries are respected.
Recovery is valued.
Asking for help isn’t viewed as weakness.
And in psychologically safe workplaces high performance doesn’t come at the expense of health.
The 1% Leadership Reset
This month, identify one person in your team who appears to be coping exceptionally well.
Instead of thanking them for everything they’re doing, ask:
“What are you carrying at the moment that nobody else can see?”
Then listen.
You might discover that your strongest employee needs support long before they need time off.
Final Thoughts
Burnout isn’t a sudden collapse.
It’s a slow build that often gets applauded on the way up.
If we want resilient workplaces, we must stop measuring wellbeing only by performance.
Sometimes the people who look strongest are working hardest to stay standing. It’s the duck constantly paddling under the water just to stay afloat.
What if the person most at risk isn’t the one who’s struggling visibly?
What if it’s the one everyone describes as ‘our safest pair of hands’?
Next Month
Next month we’re going to look at why holidays alone can’t fix burnout.
How I Can Help
I work with organisations to build strategic, evidence-based approaches to mental health and resilience.
Not one-off sessions.
Not tick-box well-being.
But practical, measurable change that:
Reduces absence
Improves morale
Builds sustainable performance
I meet your people where they are.
I give them tools that work.
And I help you embed change that lasts.
If that’s what you’re looking for, let’s talk.
Carol Hickson is a Therapist, Life Coach, Workplace Trainer, MHFA Instructor and a mental health and resilience Author. She builds mental health and wellbeing strategies for businesses, audits staff wellbeing, creates training programmes, coaches staff and shares best practice to mitigate psychosocial risk in the workplace.